Thursday, October 2, 2008

Midnight Dews

Alone in the room, I listen to Aiza Seguerra's rendition of Gary Valenciano's Fool Till The End, and I can't help but think how fool I am to be still attached to someone who doesn't really deserve it. I don't know but maybe its just me, or its just time wouldn't let me let go of it.

At this point, I'm a little bit confused, that's why I need to pray, but the more I want to pray right now, the more I am unable to. Could anybody do this for me? Even if I have a shelter here, I am a homeless nobody in a far away, cold-stricken land.

Autumn changes the colors of the leaves, and as days pass by, the surroundings gets colder; and it will be my first winter experience. I am not sure and I can't imagine how cold is it going to -50 degrees centigrade. Quite freightening, but I have to be prepared, physically and moreover, emotionally.

Having a little bit of the blues and waves right now, my spirits are quite weakened. I'm just thankful that I have a friend out there who stay close even though far. Several days that we kept on talking over the phone for an hour or two, via that long distance phone card with an 11-minute syndrome. It really helps, but there's no talk session tonight because of that technical synopsis I have to finish.

Sometimes I wonder how much God blesses me since coming here, and I wonder why it seems I haven't given God much recognition of it. I'm so grateful though, but I feel that its not enough.

Exactly 13 days to go, I will be reunited with my family and it's something I look forward to. Having them here could ease up the waves I'm in to....well, family always sticks closer as they say.